Once I found my tribe, my life changed. It wasn’t about seeking new friends, but rather the inward journey of healing what needed to be healed within myself, becoming who I really was, and following the whispers of my heart. I stopped hiding who I was out of fear of judgement (which was really, really hard after more than 2 decades of hiding), and stepped into the Truth of my soul.
I remember poignantly the moment I no longer had to hide. John and I were just dating. I “snuck” off to go to a place called the Goddess Temple, which at the time was a haven for me to express who I was spiritually while still hiding out in all other areas of my life. I would dress all flowy and goddessy, and put a sparkly bindi on my 3rd eye. But I never put on the bindi (and even some of the clothes) until I was in the parking lot of the Goddess Temple, god forbid anyone should see me. One day, I returned home and had totally forgotten I still had the bindi on my forehead. I walked in and John looked at me right away with a sort of questioning smile, as if to say “where were you?”. In a panic I quickly ripped the bindi off my forehead and muttered “oh sorry, just spiritual stuff I was doing” and b-lined it for my bedroom to change my clothes. He stopped what he was doing and got up from the table, walked right over to me and looked me in the eyes. He said, “You never have to hide who you are. You look beautiful. Please keep it on”, then took the bindi out of my hand and placed it back on my 3rd eye.
I realized then my time of hiding was over. My day-to-day vibration shifted from the belief I had to BE something (entrepreneur, smart, attractive, a dutiful wife, normal, fit in to society, to just being ME – whoever or whatever I wanted to be in any given moment. I had to accept in my heart that being me was enough. But more than anything, I had to be willing to open my heart and be seen for the truth in my soul.